3 Ways I Can Be a Better Friend
I love my girlfriends. I don’t know what I would do without them. In fact, my husband makes jokes about how he comes second to my best friends. I try to be that supportive, positive, and mostly comedic bestie who picks you up when you’re down. I’m that friend you call who will make you laugh when you feel like you want to cry–even if it’s at my own expense. But I recently came to the conclusion that I could be an even better friend. I used to believe that I needed to be consistently positive with my friends, but the truth is, I need to be better at following the cues when their intuition is speaking loud and clear. I’ve discovered that the best way to be a good friend is to support the people I love, even when it might feel uncomfortable to me. And here’s how I am going to do that.
Acknowledge THEIR truth.
You know those awkward moments when your friends speak their truth but it’s too uncomfortable for you to accept so you deny it. For example, my bestie had a job interview and she made it to the final round. I was so proud of her and knew that she would get the job. But when she left that final interview, she just knew, on a deep intuitive level, that she didn’t get the job. I hate to see my friends down, so I insisted that she was just being hard on herself and tried to keep the conversation positive. But all that time, I believed her and I knew she didn’t get the job.
I wish I would have said, “Sorry, girl. You’ll get it next time! Let’s go to a coffee shop this weekend and I’ll help you apply to more positions.”
I can still be positive AND acknowledge the truth without making myself uncomfortable.
Don’t agree with them JUST because they’re your friend.
This is a tough one for me. I try to avoid conflict, so I often agree with the person even when I think they are wrong, and just move on.
*Sound the bad friend alarm*
It’s okay to tell the person they are wrong. In fact, you should. Because sometimes that is what your friend needs to hear.
My best friend is actually really good at not agreeing with me just because I’m her friend. When I have an argument with my husband and I tell her my point of view, she expresses that she always supports me and my decisions first and foremost, but she also tells me she can see it from both sides.
Having someone to ground me is so important, and I also need to give my friends that same experience.
Accept help from your friends (and don’t be afraid to ask for it).
I’m guilty of being the girl who thinks she can do everything on her own, when in reality, I simply cannot (because it’s impossible!!).
I have this limiting belief that if I ask for help, it means that I am weak. But I think that asking for help is often a sign of courage and empowerment. There is a reason that women are more powerful in groups. And that is because, when women come together, great things happen. So, from now on ,I will be accepting help from my friends (and asking for it when I need it).
I am so grateful for my friends and all the love, support, and laughter they bring to my life—and I hope that I can provide the same back to them.
I’d love to hear from you. Let me know how you empower your besties! <3