“I don’t care if you’re my flesh and blood. I hate everything you stand for.”
“I need our relationship to go to the next level.”
If only it were as simple as just spitting it out.
But in reality, some conversations just really, really suck to have.
Because you don’t want to be hurtful.
You don’t want to be cruel.
And you really, really don’t want to be rejected.
Of course, you also don’t want it to spiral into blame, yelling,
crying, threats, awkward silence, or the horribly final,
“Well, I guess that’s it, then. Have a nice life.”
Because relationships matter.
We don’t simply want to have our say; we want to actually feel heard. We want reconciliation. We want to feel a deep connection with those we love—and a sense of understanding and mutual respect with those we don’t see eye to eye with.
Hard conversations can be graceful. Generous. Honest. Giving. Effective. Beautifully direct.
That’s why we’ve created this course, which you can call on whenever it’s time to face the conflict head on.
Because mature adulting requires hard conversations.
Hard Conversations TOOLKIT
How to Navigate Those Tricky “Can We Talk” Moments
Soon, you’ll be able to:
- Dive right in without hemming and hawing or waiting for “just the right moment.”
- Make the other person feel invited rather than confronted. (No more, “Uh-oh. Where’s this going?”)
- Ask yourself the exact right questions beforehand, so you’re clear and beautifully-expressed (instead of reckless or tongue-tied).
- Pause and think without squirming or compulsively filling the dead air with things you didn’t mean to say.
- Make the whole talk feel like a win-win.
- Wrap it up cleanly, even if you don’t come to an agreement.
- Be such a master that you never dread or avoid a hard conversation again.
Here’s what you’ll get instantly
Hard Conversations Interactive and Printable Workbook
- How to start: Learn to turn “We have to talk” from a big “Uh-oh” to a gracious invitation.
- Info on navigating the three “phases” of a hard conversation: before, during and after.
- Reflection questions to “grade” your conversations as you practice, and make each next one better.
- At-a-glance quick tips that’ll be little lifesavers each time you thumb through and use them.
- “Shouldn’t I just let bygones be bygones?” “What’s the point when they’re just going to get offended?” “How do I get through to someone who never listens?”…And other burning FAQs—with our answers.
Hard Conversations Audio Empowerments
- Prepping your conversation: Kelly reminds you what to focus on and bolsters your confidence to go ahead and do this thing.
- Right before: This is the “you got this” pep talk you need to go for it and stay on track.
- After: You did it! Kelly helps you check in with yourself and keep that conversation muscle limber and ready to go again.
here’s what people are saying
“Everyone needs to stop what they’re doing, call up that difficult relative or co-worker, and have the hard conversation you’ve been avoiding right now! This is an extremely pragmatic course that will give you the tools and confidence to not only get through the difficult moments, but also learn and grow from them. As the course says, there are no ‘wrong’ ways to go about having the hard conversations—but there are ways that are more effective than others. And this will give you an amazing head start!”
“I was never comfortable with confrontation, but the Hard Conversations Toolkit made me realize that it’s possible to change confrontation into conversation. By being vulnerable and honest rather than defensive and always needing to be right, I know that I give other people the freedom to do the same. And that’s what creates genuine connection, relationships, and healing.”
“This course taught me that I don’t have to show up perfect and persuasive in the hard conversations. In fact, my vulnerability and willingness to question my own assumptions are important assets. I learned that a hard conversation can be a beautiful way to expand a relationship. It doesn’t have to be about fighting or coming out on top or being ‘right.’ It can be about those places where there’s room to grow and come to new realizations about your circumstances and relationships. This is ultimately very freeing.”
“I would recommend the Hard Conversations Toolkit to anyone who struggles with effective communication or confrontation. Since completing the course, my tough conversations are more rational and pragmatic—instead of emotional, all over the place, and drawn out. The nine pointers in the course for an effective and complete conversation are a great help when it comes to staying on track. Hard conversations are still hard, but I feel more prepared and satisfied at the end of them, now that I have the knowledge that the toolkit provides.”
“This course makes the beneficial distinction between assertive/powerful and aggressive/domineering. Lessons learned from Hard Conversations provide insight into the benefits of recognizing your inner power while providing the tools to verbally communicate your strength.”
“To show up authentically in the world often requires us to speak truths that are scary and hard. Many of us, however, were taught the opposite: to not rock the boat or ruffle feathers. But when we are not able to ask for what we need, we end up hurting not only ourselves but those around us. The Hard Conversations Toolkit provides step-by-step processes for having the hard conversations but also for identifying when they are necessary and how to prepare for the what and why. It honestly feels like a strong hand-holding along the path, especially helpful for those of us who are learning to break the cycle of silence and start to say what we need. One of the most powerful parts of this course is the workbook section, which allows for processing feelings, fears, and even resistance along the way. Coupled with the audio empowerment series, this course has already allowed me to make confident changes in the way that I address hard conversations.”
How long have you been letting
that hard conversation eat at you?
What if you could just get these tricky talks out of the way and breathe
a sigh of “that went better than I thought it would” relief?
What if you could get insanely good at saying what you need to say, every time? Without putting it off.
Never again hold it in till you’re bursting with blame and resentment.
Say goodbye to shit-storms of passive-aggressive finger-pointing, or explosive anger and accusations.
You’re about to find out what life is like when you don’t sit on resentment, nurse grudges,
or let confrontations go off the rails.
(Spoiler: It’s amazing.)